- You stop every 15 minutes while grocery shopping to feed the nestlings temporarily residing in your purse.
- You stop traffic on a 4-lane highway to retrieve an animal while your spouse pretends they don't know you.
- There is more frozen animal food in your freezer than human food.
- You "react" every time you see a cardboard box.
- You assume every phone call you receive (at work OR at home) is about a injured/orphaned animal and respond accordingly.
- You don't think it's strange at all to have dead animals in your freezer at home.
- Your family picture includes one or more wild animals in it.
- You are known as the local "vet" for everything that was once known as "almost roadkill".
- More than 5 species of animals eat out of the same bowl.
- Your neighbor calls and they want you to come and get your raccoon out of their tree.
- You plan your vacation around the "birthing" season.
- Your email letter is misspelled because an animal fell on your keyboard, and you apologize for it.
- You have to explain to the long distance operator that the number dialed was accidentely dialed by your raccoon and you don't wish to be charged for it.
- You can't understand why your friend screamed when she found a few mealworms in your hairbrush.
- You say, "Yes, they poop on me"... before anyone asks.
- You're in the mall, and all you catch are the words "The Bird Lady".
- You're happy when you get a gift certificate for earthworms.
- You've washed a few smelt accidently in your Maytag.
- You have a different mental picture than everyone else when you hear the words "Some loon is in my parking space!"
- Feathers in your hair are not a fashion statement.
- You buy more babyfood than anyone else in town, and you don't have any children.
- Your linen closet contains more than five heating pads.
- Friends arrive for dinner and bring roadkills that they picked up on the way over.
- Overnight guests cannot stay in the guestrooms because there are ducklings in the tubs and incubators in the rooms.
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